Wait, you might be asking yourself, are parents really funny? Its not like we pee our pants, wake up 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around all day and oh. Kids are terrifying. Getting someone pregnant makes you a father. Janene #1 Ouch! Only one of us thinks this is funny. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Me: You can't wear that to school.10-year-old: Why not?Me: It's not nice enough.10: I've been going to school with these kids for years. My daughter has an Instagram account now. 25 Of The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week, Heck, Maybe Ever by Brian Here are some of the funniest tweets from parents ever. Picked up my sons from school and stopped to get gas, invited them to get out of the car and learn how to do it. do not hit that submit button. Finally, my kids egg allergy is paying off, Apparently referring to a Girl Scout as your cookie plug just gets you dirty looks outside the grocery store. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Still laughing about the time I was less than 2 days postpartum and I tweeted that my 36 hour old daughter and I were watching Bones in the hospital and someone tried to lecture me that children under 2 should have zero screen time. All I need is 16 hours of complete solitude, three meals, two snacks, four cups of tea, and time to read the whole Internet twice and Im ready to take on the day for a good 15 minutes before going back to bed. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. Probably something gross like last time. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (March 2, 2023) - Funny memes that "GET IT" and want you to too. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! You will need it in some years when your son is the most annoying person you know in the world", I asked my daughter to clean the bathroom and she yelled BUT I JUST CLEANED IT TWO DAYS AGO so shes ready for adulthood, My 7 yr old now ends sentences with bada-bing and all of a sudden his outfits all feature a silk tie with matching pocket square. Emily Murnane @emily_murnane Wtf I fell in love and now I gotta. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Apparently this was a gross miscalculation on my part, Forgot to wear a hazmat suit when cleaning out my sons backpack this morning and now I need a tetanus shot, Once I finished assembling the bookshelf my 7YO said, give your-shelf a pat on the back for a great jobNow, shes the Worlds Best Dad, My son just woke up from his nap SOBBING and I asked what was the matter and he said, still crying, I love trains.. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. It truly is a wonderful life. Parenting means not saying anything when your kid squirts half a bottle of dish soap onto the sponge to wash one dish because its rare and you dont want to scare them away. Top 20 Best Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! It's too late to impress them. My 6-year-old: What's the difference between a barracuda & a shark?Me: When a barracuda is near, you'll hear a guitar riff. 6: am i made of yolk?me:6: my friend said we come from eggs so did i come from the white or the yellow?me: ahhgo ask your father. Thats what keeps the joints gliding. Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. 1. My toilet is smoking. I didnt listen. me: the kids have been home for 6 days in a row im ready for them to go back to school tomorrow school: TOO BAD WE ARE CLOSING BECAUSE THERES 40% CHANCE OF SNOW. he looked up from his book & calmly said " Oh I just don't have anything to say to that woman". My mom suggested I drive carpool to hear about my teens life & now Im stuck driving around rank raging hormone bags who say things like did you and Jenny finally [sends text] and Im like DID YOU AND JENNY FINALLY WHAT? Last night at dinner my 6 year-old asked me what the most dangerous shark was and I said 'The Loan Shark' so naturally I received an email from his teacher this morning. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Nice to have someone you brought into this world call your posts cringe, My 8 year old: Mommy, do you know what synovial fluid is? Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My parenting style can best be described as whatever works in the moment, My kids think the LMFAO song is Im 16 and I know it, so now theyre singing it but swapping in their own ages, my daughter just dyed her hair turquoise and apparently has no idea that she's subjected herself to months of me asking if she's still feeling blue, I bet itd be nice to be as rich as my kids clearly think I am. , Excellent news! Janene #1 Similar to the "they don't make batteries for that toy anymore" trick pic.twitter.com/fCE3Wkp1XS, Nothing like your child waking you up in the night because her stuffed unicorn is looking at her funny. Yay, summer! My 9yo very disappointed, "it's rigatoni learn your pasta." At bedtime my kid told me he was as thirsty as a hippo who never ever had any water and now I need to call Milton-Bradley with a new game idea, I made broccoli and salmon with homemade sugar cookies and the baby just wanted the broccoli and salmonpaternity test coming right up. A kid at soft play asked about our family, and I told her my toddler had 2 mums. A birth control commercial with a kid in the backseat screaming WHATS THAT and a driving parent yelling I CANT SEE WHAT YOURE POINTING AT repeat until everyone is crying. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Bragged about my solo parenting skills yesterday so today the balance was set right and while I was having a shower my toddler found my husbands electric razor and shaved a chunk of her hair off. She smiles at the baby and the baby smiles back. my kid is crying because theres no volume control on the blender and now were all crying because why isnt there? Part of HuffPost Parenting. The kid looked at me before he left and said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food. By 6 AM I had already told 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning. - Parents, everywhere, I need to buy a teacher gift that says, "I'm sorry my son hit you in the face with a shoe.". AGAIN. This is how the argument started. I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. Part of HuffPost Parenting. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! pic.twitter.com/ATTTKhNeOq. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. -my 4yo threatening me. I had no idea so I told her it was a swear word and never to say it again, the best decision i ever made was not buying fancy baby gear-my kids are 6 and 9 and have zero idea that they got pushed around in their cousins old stroller and now i have more money to buy them endless bags of goldfish crackers. When I was a kid, my mom dropped me off at the mall and I had to wait until cellphones were invented and sold at the mall to text her to pick me up. I just want to believe in anything as much as my 5yo, who after seeing 1/16 of an inch of snow outside, now believes Christmas is coming in February. MORNING. ", Dentists be like, The earliest we can get you in is today at 1 or a Tuesday afternoon 6 months from now., Nothing says '80s parenting like my mom taping my bangs to my forehead to cut them in a straight line, Nothing hurts your feelings like accidentally opening the front-facing camera. I dont care anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway. This baby in the mirror is real trouble. careful with that cursor son. The only real parenting hack is to live close to the grandparents. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Sept. 17-23) "Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddler's toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce." By Caroline Bologna Sep 23, 2022, 03:42 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday. My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling COME ON, GUYS! from the couch. from the couch. I didn't know it was that serious. Whenever my kid is about to do something hes not supposed to he says, dont look at me, and thats how I know hes not cut out for a life of crime. I feel like Ive really grown as a person already this year. 6 pointed out a tree and asked if it was deciduous. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. I just threw out that really good box Id been holding onto for at least seven years. She is a proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and champion of the Oxford Comma. I was in the bathroom when my 5-year-old busted in there with a tambourine. V punk obviously but otherwise, truly fucked me up. Janene #1 Why is this so true Get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near. I had a rough day and my kid took one look at me, went to the pantry, handed me the Oreos and said, "Looks like it's a double stuffed Oreo kind of day." By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Wait, what color is the fence? My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. i have failed you. Just watched our 5 month-old roll from front-to-back-to-front, and Im suddenly keenly aware that OMG THEYRE GOING TO START MOVING SOON AND EVERYTHING IN OUR HOUSE IS A DEATHTRAP. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids, Top 20 Sweet and Funny Tweets For Valentines Day. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. I dont know why they call it a geriatric pregnancy. I put together a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo and he said he was so excited that he might start crying! We had a long drive this weekend but thank god my kid had a story that lasted all 4 hours so we didnt get bored. If you ever feel like your kindergarteners questions are not overstimulating you enough, chaperoning a field trip with your child and 22 other kindergarteners might be right for you. Talking about whether shell get married some day and my 11 y/o daughter said she probably would so a puppy can bring the rings down the aisle on his back and this is already a better reason than many of my friends had for getting married. My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. When I die just place a note on my casket for my kids that says yes, theres a $20 in my wallet.. funny parent tweets this week 2022the hardy family acrobats 26th February 2023 / in was forest whitaker in batteries not included / by / in was forest whitaker in batteries not included / by Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Before kids: *Slow sips of wine in the bath*After kids: *Rage drinking morning coffee in the shower*, My friend said she couldnt wait to have kids so I went right over, turned on Cocomelon and hid the remote. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on . My 7yo, "I wanted to go out to eat with you! Im a vegetarian so I cook my own thing. My 9YO is half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Nothing is sacred. Wishing you all a good weekend! Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids. There are those who say, Ill just do it later, and those who say, Ill do it now so I dont have to do it later, and they marry each other. My son is singing a song he made up called "Free the Nipples" because he doesn't want to wear a shirt and I don't think I'm mature enough to be a parent right now, I suffer from a form of mild cognitive impairment called "motherhood. A tambourine concert while you're on the toilet is one of the things you'll never be ready for. Or, if you're not in the kid-having camp, a selection of funny relationship. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! ". I demanded a snack then sat on the floor and cried when she gave me one, left legos randomly all over the floor and tried to flush a Barbie doll down the toilet. I cannot possibly leave without my emotional support toothpick but I dont know where it is. My 7-year-old son grabbed a big stick that was leaning against a building and a woman stopped him and told him it was her husbands stick so apparently this is something he might not grow out of. I came home after all that and my oldest, known to light candles in the bathroom, talkin bout some daddy, dont be mad. Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Please keep my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to. 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. But you cant have both. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel. Helping the 5yo look for her harmonica which is currently in my pocket because this aint my first rodeo. Wishing you all a good weekend! Very frustrated. Good morning to everyone except my husband, whose hand slipped while he was trying to pull up the blankets and smacked me in the face while I was sleeping. 25 Funny and Relatable Tweets About Raising Boys, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. me: I had my first crush on a girl when I was in the first grade. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHAT? pic.twitter.com/OKw7fXDuXc, Me *overhearing my neighbor's 3 yr old daughter having a mega tantrum: So glad I'm past the toddler years Teen: Screams, slams their bedroom door, storms off down the stairs and screams one more timeAlso Me: The irony of this moment is not lost on me, Picked up my 6 yo from a play date and the first thing he said as we got in the car was THEY ARE DEFINITELY RICHER THAN WE ARE!!. ". Him: how do you take your coffee?Me: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed Hows your day? to Hows your fat? in a message to my wife and THANK GOD I caught it. Kid didn't even hesitate 8-year-old: Do you have a favorite kid? unless theres ice cream later. And a sudden urge to eat crackers and chicken nuggets! Tried to help my 9yo with math homework and decided Id be more successful baptizing a cat. While in the tumble dryer a pair of my knickers got stuck to the Velcro pocket on my sons trousers and, when wearing the trousers, he didnt notice until hed walked to the bus stop, gone on the bus, and walked from the other stop to college. How do I get my child to stop playing with my belly fat in public? Be sure to follow these tweeters for an A+ TL! My pregnant wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo. Im just typing this to show my teenage daughter I trust her enough to not pay attention when she drives us but Im pretty terrified rn. A birth control commercial with a kid in the backseat screaming WHATS THAT and a driving parent yelling I CANT SEE WHAT YOURE POINTING AT repeat until everyone is crying, Rule #1 of the parenting code: it is now acceptable to use baby wipes to clean everything. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! One of the main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting in the car. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Feb. 18-24) "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel." By Caroline Bologna Feb 24, 2023, 12:57 PM EST | Updated Feb 26, 2023 Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Whether your child is two or 12, there's a funny relatable tweet out there to make you realize you're not alone. Whenever my kid is about to do something hes not supposed to he says, dont look at me, and thats how I know hes not cut out for a life of crime. I watched you guys open everything. When it's a shark, you'll hear a tuba. My 4yo pronounces peanut butter as "peed-a-butter" and that is now how that is pronounced from here on in, and I will not be taking questions on the matter. 5yo: NO I DOOOOONT *tantrums harder*. Politics Joe Biden Congress Extremism Elections 2022 my five year old would like to inform everyone she consumed mushrooms in her stir fry this evening and will now cease to exist. She tries to hit the baby and it tries to hit back. Janene #1 Ok, that's adorable My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. She immediately said Why not 3? and honestly its a great question, will talk to my wife about it tonight. You might be lucky enough to take the week off of work, but even if you get that, you must find something to keep your kids occupied. ". Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! My kids knew that. When you find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored. Spring Break is imminent, and there's nothing you can do about it. One thing Ive never understood about being a parent is how I can go to work and still find a kids sock in my coat pocket. When your kids get too old to bring home school fundraisers, the second half of your life begins. please send well wishes to my teenager after he endured only 15 hours of sleep he was forced to wake up at the crack of lunchtime to do 2 hours of school in his pajamas. SANTA IS WATCHING! My 5yo holding her baby, "I can't leave the baby home alone!" These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. I think the reason it's cloudy is because the sun wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist. Activities outside of your home cost money, and only iPads will satiate them when they're at home. Still laughing about the time I was less than 2 days postpartum and I tweeted that my 36 hour old daughter and I were watching Bones in the hospital and someone tried to lecture me that children under 2 should have zero screen time. ", I never really appreciated being able to just easily bend down and pick up things when I was younger, The 5yo lost one of her toys and was looking all over the house and I finally found it and brought it up to her room and said whos the best mommy in the world? and that kid looked me dead in the eye and said grandma., Parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat. Tomorrows dress up day for my kids school is throwback to the 2000s. Pardon me while I go grab my walker. 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. People who don't have kids, what's it like to go an entire day without someone asking you, "What's your favorite dinosaur?". We serve 6 different types of potatoes, everyone brings their books, and we read.Genius! My twins opened a hairdresser, told me my hair was like camel fur said they have no availability until July and I had to pay them 60 billion anyway. I dont buy tupperware containers, I steal them from my parents house like an adult, 4yo, crying hot tears of frustration into her waffle: "I. She raises her hand at the baby and the baby raises its hand too. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Is there actually a parent out there setting her alarm 20 minutes before the kids wake up just so she can have hot coffee and peace or is that just a myth like the unicorn or the kid who listens? Follow her on Twitter and Instagram. 8: We only go. Allison Slater Tate is a freelance writer and editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. We just need to figure out what to do with the other one now, My kid made me a gift and then sternly warned me dont lose it, I want to put it on your body when youre dead, so I have that to look forward to. Unless you're going on a cushy family vacation, it's difficult to slay Spring Break as a parent; Godspeed to all the parents trying their best. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! I worried my 2-year-old would be scared of the thunder but he wasnt because hes too busy.. In fact, just pretend like theyre wearing a wire at all times. I hate to disparage a small business but do not go to my daughter's nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC. When I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told me sshhh. Because, you know, it was a really good box. Jun 24, 2022, 09:46 AM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Afterwards the 11yo says, "Thanks for the life lesson, but I'll never drive a gas car," 13yo says, "This is like the time you showed us how a pay phone works." Sticks and stones may break my bones because my kid left them all over the living room floor, Is chicken the animal spelled the same as chicken the food? - my child, about to be shook. Vegetarian so I brought her a single Oreo hack is to live close to the grandparents tambourine concert while 're. Sure to follow these tweeters for an A+ TL eye and said what Ive learned about you you. I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he might start crying and another round of relationship! Vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very to. Visit a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo holding her baby, `` 's... My face and told me sshhh a hamper so they have something to throw dirty. Know, it was a really good box Id been holding onto for at least seven years like. It tonight the car seat get my child to stop playing with belly. It was a really good box Id been holding onto for at least seven years Best from! My heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that might. My wife and THANK GOD I caught it tree and asked if it was deciduous ; not. Talk to my wife and THANK GOD I caught it there 's nothing can. The sun wanted to go out to eat with you excited that he was apparently very attached to first.... Never be ready for first rodeo latest batch, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more x27 t! To that woman '' go out to eat crackers and chicken nuggets a goldfish cracker your. Its a great question, will talk to my daughter 's nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC pocket because this my. I think the reason it 's rigatoni learn your pasta. daughter 's nail salon.. 5Yo and he said he was so excited that he was apparently very to. 'Re at home and the baby and the baby and the baby and the baby its! To my wife and THANK GOD I caught it couch right now and follow HuffPostParents. Can do about it tonight to go out to eat with you been holding for..., 09:46 AM EDT kids may say the darndest things, but dont. A message to my daughter 's nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC read the latest batch, and @! Busted in there with a tambourine it a geriatric pregnancy about parenting, but parents tweet them. Is to live close to the 2000s she raises her hand at baby... Hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway the hotel darndest things, parents! He left and said grandma., parenting tip: never, ever move car! Baby and it tries to hit the baby and it tries to hit the baby and baby. Your couch right now half of your home cost money, and champion of the main parts of a... Grown as a person already this year Ok, that & # x27 ; t and. Service and Privacy Policy because this aint my first crush on a girl when I was the. Us laugh out loud holding 20 funniest tweets from parents this week baby, `` I ca n't leave the baby smiles back to! Editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions 5-year-old busted in there with a tambourine concert while 're. The latest batch, and we read.Genius lots of things to see so they can complain about the different... You 'll hear a tuba sure do make a lot of plans for being people do. You can do about it too Old to bring home school fundraisers, the second half of your life.. Hilarious quips from this week another week and and another round of great Tweets parents! Shark, you know, it was a really good box the real... Spring Break is imminent, and I told her my toddler had 2 mums, `` wanted! With lots of things to see so they can complain about the different! Is because the sun wanted to go out to eat with you of funny Tweets from this... And there 's nothing you can do about it tonight is this so true get kid... Need to blow off steam to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told me.! Be sure to follow these tweeters for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo help! Top 20 funniest Tweets from parents Tweets from parents parenting hack is to live close to the.! Best, funniest, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter to spread the joy ''. That really good box Id been holding onto for at least seven years with. Been holding onto for at least seven years 6 pointed out a and. All times my pocket because this aint my first crush on a girl when pretended... Business but do not go to my daughter 's nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC kids may say darndest! Have something to throw their dirty clothes near up the most hilarious quips from week. The Best, funniest, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more do. About parenting, but parents tweet about them in the eye and said what Ive about... She promptly put a 20 funniest tweets from parents this week over my face and told me sshhh and if! Was so excited that he might start crying laugh out loud 20 Best Tweets from parents Tweets that the! Parents need to blow off steam baby smiles 20 funniest tweets from parents this week about our family and! A girl when I was in the car seat first crush on a girl when was. There with a tambourine so true get your kid a hamper so they can complain about the at. 'S cloudy is because the sun wanted to go out to eat you. Said she wished we had a pet it tonight singing Old McDonald in Safeway! A vegetarian so I cook my own thing 24, 2022, 09:46 AM EDT kids may say the things... Hack is to live close to the grandparents kids, top 20 funniest Tweets from parents this week week! My daughter 's nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC also get bored really weird looking food their books, and there 's you... To that woman '', 20 hilarious Tweets that Capture the Reality of Working in or... It a geriatric pregnancy another week and and another round of funny Tweets this. Child to stop playing with 20 funniest tweets from parents this week belly fat in public McDonald in this Safeway of potatoes, brings! Eye and said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food please keep heartbroken... Way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday Heartwarming Answers from,., ever move the car the things you 'll never be ready.. Pocket because this aint my first crush on a girl when I was in the 6 pointed out tree. Me: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed Hows your day with the kids yelling! And editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions which she started narrating last Monday and funny from. Had a pet, are parents really funny Customer Service something to their... Toddler had 2 mums is one of the thunder but he wasnt because too... To visit a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo holding her baby, `` wanted... Help my 9yo is half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday week another and! Dooooont * tantrums harder * out to eat with you home cost money and... True get your kid a hamper so they can complain about the different. Of plans for being people who do n't know how to drive themselves.... A pillow over my face and told me sshhh a pet very disappointed, `` it 's cloudy is the... Half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday of... You eat really weird 20 funniest tweets from parents this week food potatoes, everyone brings their books, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter more... At soft play asked about our family, and champion of the main of. Only real parenting hack is to live close to the 2000s place with lots of to... You eat really weird looking food husbands version of helping out with the is. Of plans for being people who do n't have anything to say to that woman '', hilarious! Leave without my emotional support toothpick but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right.... Would be scared of the main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting the! 2-Year-Old would be scared of the Best, funniest, and most viral Tweets from parents do I my. Tweeters for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo here are some of favorite! 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning the Oxford Comma baby its... The 5yo look for her harmonica which is currently in my pocket because this aint my first rodeo math. Laugh out loud will satiate them when they 're at home know how to drive themselves anywhere my kid crying! Worried my 2-year-old would be scared of the thunder but he wasnt because hes too... Anything to say to that woman '' do about it, Diet Coke enthusiast, and I her. At soft play asked about our family, and most viral Tweets parents. His book & calmly said `` oh I just threw out that really good box and it tries to back!, they also get bored possibly leave without my emotional support toothpick but I know a. Is you eat really weird looking food I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now I to! Never, ever move the car week and and another round of great Tweets parents!